Is Your Spouse Your "Roof Crasher"?

Jesus Heals a Paralytic – Mark 2:1-12
A few days later, when Jesus again entered Capernaum, the people heard that he had come home. So many gathered that there was no room left, not even outside the door, and he preached the word to them. Some men came, bringing to him a paralytic, carried by four of them. Since they could not get him to Jesus because of the crowd, they made an opening in the roof above Jesus and, after digging through it, lowered the mat the paralyzed man was lying on. When Jesus saw their faith, he said to the paralytic, "Son, your sins are forgiven."

Now some teachers of the law were sitting there, thinking to themselves, "Why does this fellow talk like that? He's blaspheming! Who can forgive sins but God alone?"

Immediately Jesus knew in his spirit that this was what they were thinking in their hearts, and he said to them, "Why are you thinking these things? Which is easier: to say to the paralytic, 'Your sins are forgiven,' or to say, 'Get up, take your mat and walk'? But that you may know that the Son of Man has authority on earth to forgive sins… " He said to the paralytic, "I tell you, get up, take your mat and go home." He got up, took his mat and walked out in full view of them all. This amazed everyone and they praised God, saying, "We have never seen anything like this!"

What must life have been like for the paralytic man?

How did this man benefit from being from having close friends to do life with?

Consider what kind of mat you have.

Who is part of your “Fellowship of the Mat”? If you are in a crisis, whom do you call at 3 am? Who prays for you on a regular basis? Who can drop in unannounced without any embarrassment? Who can you call to celebrate a victory in your life? To what extent are you a part of a “Fellowship of the Mat” these days?

After marriage your spouse becomes your primary "roof crasher". Are we taking each other to Jesus on a regular basis? How do we put Christ back on the throne of our life? How can we help our spouse do the same?

Whose faith did Christ respond to when he healed the paralytic?

Why does Mark say “When Jesus SAW their faith”?

What can we conclude? We must take each other to Christ in FAITH. KNOWING that He alone has the power and desire to free us from our “mat”.

For your spouse, write down as many character strengths as you can think of. These strengths of character are strengths that God will use to help you, help others, pass on to children, etc.

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Now make a list of prayer needs or challenges that you currently face. (This is a private list and will not have to be shared with the group.)

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Before we pray for our spouse:

Prepare your heart to submit to God’s will. Do not try and impose your desires for your spouse on God but rather ask God to make known His desires for you and your spouse.

God knows our thoughts and needs but He responds to our prayers.

Prayer is seeking God’s presence and the release of His power.

Pray for God to get the Glory in helping you overcome difficult situations.

NOW TAKE TURNS PRAYING TOGETHER AS A COUPLE. START BY THANKING GOD FOR YOUR SPOUSE, THANK HIM SPECIFICALLY FOR THE STRENGTHS THAT WERE GIFTED TO YOUR SPOUSE. NEXT, TRADE PAPERS AND PRAY FOR THE REQUESTS OF YOUR SPOUSE, IT IS IMPORTANT TO PRAY FOR EACH OTHERS STRUGGLES. REMEMBER, YOU ARE THE "ROOF CRASHER" FOR YOUR SPOUSE.

Conclusion:

Isaiah 49:15 (New International Reader’s Version)
The Lord answers, "Can a mother forget the baby who is nursing at her breast? Can she stop showing her tender love to the child who was born to her? She might forget her child. But I will not forget you. I have written your name on the palms of my hands.

This letter of advice was given to me by my dad just before I was married back in 1997. My parents have been happily married for over 40 years and they have been an inspiration to Ashley and I in our own marriage. These words of wisdom from him are like gold. I thought I'd share.

Andy, Your Dad’s Advice

Talk! Talk! Talk about every thing with Ashley and respect each others opinion, and use each others areas of expertise. Together you will be an unbeatable team!

Don’t ever complain about your wife to your friends about little or big things, it gives others the wrong impression about your marriage and relationship.

Money! Agree on how to spend it . Make a budget together so you are in total agreement about where your priorities are. Decide how much to spend without discussion.

Complaining! A little goes a long way. Don’t fall into the trap of making complaining a major topic of conversation. Don’t go to work some where for 8 hrs a day then spend the first hour together complaining about it. Be a positive person! Change what needs changing, fix what you can fix, understand the realities of a situation then, comment on it, learn to live with it, or take yourself out of the situation. Complaining is counter-productive.

If something bothers you about your wife, discuss it with her, that is, only IF it is something you can’t live with. Remember, you did not marry her to change her. You fell in love with here the way she is.

Have a real date at least once every other week. I mean something alone. People get too wrapped up in their groups and don’t make the time for each other. In most group activities you really are not getting much time together.

Keep the romance in your marriage! One minor part of that is giving each other a little privacy, for example, bathroom privacy. How romantic is it for your wife to see you go to the bathroom.

Kids will change everything. Get to know each other well first. One major change in your life at a time is enough, although not always possible. Kids will be fun, but much work. You really have to work a team with the kids, give each other a break for a few minutes each day. You will have to devote yourselves to your Kids, but don’t for get your date! You start out just the two of you and you will end up again that way, so keep your personal relationship alive and well while you go through the other parts of your life.

Don’t embarrass her in front of friends or family. This could be an embarrassing story that you could choose not to tell, or choosing to discreetly help her avoid a potentially embarrassing situation, even though it could seem funny on one level. Make the distinction between funny and embarrassing. It is an important one.

Always be the person, do the things and say the things, that Ashley can be proud of when she thinks of you.

Always be the one person Ashley can trust any situation and never do anything to shake that trust.

Don’t keep secrets! Don’t let some one tell you something that you can’t tell Ashley! Tell them, of course you don’t mean my wife.

You two will be as one against the world!

Love, Dad

Love and Respect

We will begin the new Journey Group season with the book "Love and Respect" by Dr. Emerson Eggerichs. Pick up a copy of the book at any large book store or order it online at http://www.loveandrespect.com.

I can't wait to see everyone again and hopefully we will be meeting some new couples throughout the year. You all made Ashley and I feel so welcome and comfortable last year when we joined. Thank you for that.

See you on September 3rd, 7 PM at the Brewer's home.